WORLD AIDS DAY 2014

In a single moment, my life was irreversibly altered. The doctors told me I was hiv positive I had just turned 27, Looking back, what I needed was information, education.

World AIDS Day, observed on 1 December every year, is dedicated to raising awareness of the AIDS pandemic caused by the spread of HIV infection, and mourning those who have died of the disease. Government and health officials, non-governmental organizations and individuals around the world observe the day, often with education on AIDS prevention and control.

As of 2013, AIDS has killed more than 36 million people worldwide (1981-2012), and an estimated 35.3 million people are living with HIV, making it one of the most important global public health issues in recorded history. Despite recent improved access to antiretroviral treatment in many regions of the world, the AIDS epidemic claims an estimated 2 million lives each year, of which about 270,000 are children.

It has been more than 30 years since the first cases of AIDS were reported in the U.S. HIV is still a reality for more than a million Americans.

The stigma associated with HIV remains extremely high and fear of discrimination causes some Americans to avoid learning their HIV status, disclosing their status, or accessing medical care.

November Favorites

Gilette Mac 3 Turbo Review

Gillette Mach 3 Turbo razor combines Gillette’s 3 Blade Shaving Technology with Anti-Friction blades that gently glide over your. Its pivoting razor head with 10 Microfins follow every contour on your face for outstanding comfort and closeness. A lubricating strip on the razor head gradually fades to white, to indicate when you may be no longer getting an optimal shave.  

I have never had a wet shave in my life always use a electric trimmer, i'm a sucker for good adverts and that is the reason i bought this razor, and i've got to say i was pleasently suprised at how correct the advert is, i actually enjoyed shaving i'm not saying it has converted me and i will be having wet shaves from this day forward but its a good shave if you like the wet shave.

Alpha H Liquid Gold

low pH delivery system to effectively diminish wrinkles, pigmentation and sun damage.

The Glycolic based formulation works like an “overnight facial” to brighten and revitalize tired, ageing skin, and radically improve the appearance of the complexion.

For mature, sun damaged, prematurely ageing and for acne-scarred skin

It doesn't hurt to start early, right? without fail this is the best product i have ever put on my skin, this to me is the holy grail of skin products, i generally use it after I've showered and before i sleep followed by my moisturizer, i think you are suppose to use it every other day but i don't i like the way it makes my skin feel so use it daily.

Got2b 2sexy Hairspray

This plumping hairspray gives you that push up you need to flaunt that sexy, show-stopping big volume! Be naughty and big up your style!

I have short hair so it doesn't give me volume, the reason i get this is because it smells divine and just gives enough hold.

TIGI Bed Head Wax Stick

Instantly creates texture and hold.

- Leaves no build-up
- Soft and pliable
- Semi-matte finish. 

I love this, got to be the best hair product ive used, it is pricey and does last along time, infact i love most Bed Head products just cost's too much so tend not to buy it as often as i would like.

Lee Stafford Poker Straight Flat Iron

Straightening irons are essential in achieving a super sexy, straight look - but we are all faced with the possibility of damaged hair. This is your solution: designed to give you smooth, straight, sexy hair without the guilt of damaging it in the process!

I Guess it does what it says on the tin, i'm over stocked on Lee Stafford Products, these are my go too products and smell amazing, i think i'd even buy his perfume if it smelled the same haha.

Energising Vitality Lotion

Re-oxygenating rebalancing vitamin-enriched lotion. Helps stimulate and regenerate skin (Micro-encapsulated native oxygen & vitamin C). Purifies and brightens skin (white lily extract). Helps re plump, moisturize and protect (hyaluronic acid and vitamin E). Perfects skin tone and skin texture. nourishes and improves skin elasticity. Suitable for all skin types including young or sensitive skin

I did come across these products as my cousin sell's them it's abit like (avon) way they are sold but you can buy direct from the website, i really dont use it how its ment to be used, i just spray it on my face just to feel fresh i suppose it will be better in the summer, but either way i like it, there's not relly a scent too it but its good, trust!

Vicks Sinex Decongestant Nasal Spray

As we all know its the flu season :( and yes i was the one who caught the awful bug (a week after i had my flu jab may i add) and no it wasn't man flu i never suffer from flu this is my first time having flu in as long as i can remember, and although i filled my body with as many flu products as possible, it didn't cure me, and i was laid up in bed for 5 days, but this did make life so much easier for me, i heard good reviews on the first defense but considering i was 2 days in i thought it would be pointless, but yeah this stuff really does make life much easier.

Thanks for Reading!!

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HIV/AIDS

Well my blog was intended to be a review blog and all i seem to write about is hiv, but there is a very good reason and i guess im reviewing what i've seen in a way, we all know (at least i hope you know) that its HIV testing week, and the support i see on social media is astounding, maybe it was the same last year i dont know as i was newly diagnosed and HIV things was the last thing i wanted to see. But I've got to say as a gay guy myself i couldn't be more proud to be apart of this world, yes we know there's good and bad with everything but one charity impaticular is showing nothing but love and support Terrence Higgins Trust, although many of you might say who are positive that a charity is doing nothing for you personally (yes I've heard people say this) and maybe they aren't but what they are doing in a whole is truly amazing, more and more people each year seem to be warming up to the word HIV and realizing its not a death sentence and are more willing to get tested. If you don't already please donate to some kind HIV/AIDS charity, i don't work for any charity so I'm not been forced into saying this like some, but i see the good its doing not just for us gays but for the world of HIV/AIDS, also one thing I've noticed with Terrence Higgins Trust on their Facebook page they are working closely with 56 Dean Street if it wasn't for this organization i honestly believe i would be very ill at this moment in time if not worse so many thanks to you guys.

Please give as little or as much as you have to HIV/AIDS charities and see the difference I'm a big believer that there is a cure for HIV and with our money these charities are steps closer to finding these.

ALSO KNOW YOUR STATUS..

There May Be a Monumental New Finding in the Fight Against HIV/AIDS

HIV Testing Week 22-29 November

Nearly 22,000 people in the UK don't know they are living with HIV.

HIV is a virus most commonly caught by having sex without a condom.

It can also be passed on by sharing infected needles and other injecting equipment, and from an HIV-positive mother to her child during pregnancy, birth and breastfeeding.

HIV stands for human immunodeficiency virus. The virus attacks the immune system, and weakens your ability to fight infections and disease.

There is no cure for HIV, but there are treatments to enable most people with the virus to live a long and healthy life. 

Getting tested

The only way to find out if you have HIV is to have an HIV test.

If you think you have put yourself at risk of HIV, you should seek medical advice and have a test as soon as recommended. The earlier HIV is detected, the more likely it is that treatment will be successful.

Emergency anti-HIV medication called PEP (post-exposure prophylaxis) may stop you becoming infected, but treatment must be started within three days of coming into contact with the virus.

There are a number of places you can get an HIV test, including your GP surgery and sexual health clinics and clinics run by charities including the Terrence Higgins Trust.

Most HIV tests in the UK involve taking a small sample of blood and sending this to a laboratory for analysis. These tests can provide a reliable result from four weeks after possible infection. It is now also possible to test using a saliva sample or pin-prick (blood-spot) test, but these tests do not reliably detect HIV as early as laboratory tests.

You may get the results in hours, days or weeks, depending on the type of test you take.

If your test is positive, you will be referred to a specialist HIV clinic where you'll have more blood tests to show what effect HIV is having on your immune system and be able to discuss treatment options.

Find out more about coping with a positive HIV test.

Anyone who has sex without a condom or shares needles is at risk of HIV infection. However, the two groups with highest rates of HIV in the UK are gay and bisexual men and African men and women.

NICE recommends that annual HIV tests be offered to all men who have sex with men, and more frequent testing be offered to those at higher risk due to multiple partners or unsafe sexual practices.

 Please take time to get yourself tested find a clinic near you.

Zachary Quinto - HIV PreP

GAYS AND EQUALITY....REALLY!

GAYS AND EQUALITY....REALLY!

Us as gay men, want equality, how can we expect equality when we are our own worst enemy, we are the worst people for judging people, we have all done it.

 What annoys me more is the fact it proves how uneducated people are, for example, I was talking to a random guy super hot (he knew he was hot) and we got onto the subject of films, he asked me what my favourite film was and I said "I don't really have a favourite film, its more educational documentary", clearly he wasn't impressed yet he pretended he was interested so he asked what it was and I said, "Stonewall Uprising", he didn't have a clue what the hell I was talking about, which I was shocked but then again maybe I wasn't surprised, there's many people in our community who are quite happy to go to a pride fight gay rights but don't have a clue where it started, I'm not saying by watching the documentary you will know everything I'm just saying there is a history of people who fought for what we have and no one even knows, I do feel sorry for some people, this guy was 35 and didn't have a clue about the aids epidemic, or any major events in gay history to him HIV ment you was brown bread dead, so I asked him if he knew what the reason behind pride was and the answer he gave me couldn't have shocked me as much as it did, he replied with "yeah its the one time of the year us gay guys get together party, drink, and hook up" I'm 27 yet I felt like he was 27 and I was 35, how is it possible for someone not to know such a important part of gay history, it really got me thinking why certain things are frowned upon in my community such as HIV, we all know how people with the virus are perceived, I mean since I got diagnosed it was 100% certain that I caught HIV from been a slut according to my community which couldn't have been far from the truth, then I got thinking why is this the case? maybe its lack of intelligence?? maybe its ignorance???.

No wait! maybe its because HIV is a hidden subject, we must not talk about the importance of the subject or we will upset folk.

Well fuck it I'm HIV and I'm the exact same person as I was before and no don't worry if I breath on you, your not going to catch it so you are safe to sit beside me, I sometimes wish people educated themselves, if you want equality maybe start at home, and what I mean by that is respect/accept your own community before expecting the world to accept our community.

It's really disheartening to know my own community are so wrapped up in following the leader, its like a fad, pride events get millions of attendees but I bet 70% of those people haven't got a clue what it's about, Ive been to many prides and I have got to admit, it was just a big gay party, nothing was mentioned about the history, so am I surprised so many people don't understand!!!!!!

FAKE BAKE SELF TAN

FAKE BAKE REVIEW

As we all know there are many products in the fake bake, line too many to write about every single one so to make it easier for me and you i'm just gonna write about the ones i use on a regular basis.

WHAT FAKE BAKE SAY

Fake Bake gives an instant sun-kissed colour and develops into a long lasting sunless fake tan by combining naturally derived tanning agents DHA and Erythulose­ guaranteeing longer lasting (up to 50% longer), more natural-looking results. We have developed botanical ingredients to remove parabens and artificial preservatives. Our specialist self-tans offer added benefits like anti ageing, anti cellulite and anti oxidants.

Theres three main products that i use and i love, the only issue i have had with fake bake is from the Airbrush Instant Self-Tan, and that was simply my own fault as i didn't clean out the spray so it blocked and become unusable. 

So lets get to my favorite Fake Bake Tan although one is a tan and others are preparing and maintaining, 

Fake Bake Flawless Liquid Tan

The dual function cosmetic bronzer gives an instant, golden tan then goes on to develop into a long lasting, sunless glow. Fast drying, fast absorbing Flawless is transfer resistant, so can be worn throughout the day and it is formulated with Fake Bakes’ signature triple tanning agents (DHA boosted by DMI & Erythulose) for an intense tan that lasts and lasts. 

100% does what it says on the tin, its perfect in every sense of the word, it smells beautiful as well, it reminds me of holidays that coconut smell, i use the body polish every day and the oil free moisturizer for a few days before i apply the tan which you dont have to i just find the tan goes on better, the only thing about the body polish and moisturizer is the scent, i hate the smell luckily it doesn't linger on my skin, i know people who love the smell, I'm just very scent sensitive.

 The moisturizer is also really good for maintaining the tan after, i have had experiences where i didnt moisturize after and the tan didn't last long and went patchy like all tans do but also when i do moisturize with the fake bake moisturizer i have noticed how long it does last and gradually fades with no patched so i just top it back up, the names Flawless is a very good name for the tan as it simply is, I've never had the orange experience from this tan and i get so many good compliments when I'm wearing the tan. 

I have noticed another oil that i haven't seen before Fake Bake smoothie oil so if anyone has tried this product please let me know as it will be my next purchase.  

I'm not claiming to be some kind of expert of tan I'm just simple guy who has been wearing fake tan for several years, I'm just letting you know my experiences with tan and my likes, i will add that this is the only fake tan that doesn't give me the orange glow.

Please let me know your view's on  fake tan, your likes and dislikes, your go too tan, im always looking for products to experiment with :)

 

REN Clean Skincare

Just another quick review on two products from the Ren clean skincare range, i have very sensitive skin and i was recommended to try two products from a friend in the business as alot of products i was using irritated my skin, i have combination skin and find it difficult to find a product that i love, the products where, Ultra moisture day cream and Frankincense revitalising night cream which is now known as V-cense revitalising night cream.

The main aim in Ren or the most important part about REN is that they are made from natural ingredients here's what it says on their website, (REN is free from synthetic fragrance, mineral oil, petrolatum, sulfate detergents, synthetic colours, animal ingredients and parabens) sounds good right? I'm gonna head the next paragraphs with the product, what REN says about the product and my views/opinions with my experience.

Ultra moisture day cream

Specifically formulated with a moisture replenishing complex to leave dry skin soothed, comfortable, optimally hydrated and looking beautifully healthy

Unfortunately non of what it claimed to do actually happened with me, i will add i only used these product for 7 days,but still nothing except moisturises but then E45 cream moisturises for half the price, i will say the texture was nice and they smell very natural, if natural was a smell.

V-cense revitalising night cream

Formulated to recharge, revitalise and intensively hydrate the skin overnight, this multi action cream visibly smooths fine lines, evens skin tone and offers antioxidant protection to help combat the signs of premature ageing

I will say with this product as much as i haven't seen a vast improvement, i have seen a little improvement to my skin and with it been anti-ageing I'm clearly going to have to use it for a long time, i use this cream every night obviously along side other products, and the next day my face feels very moisturised and although i don't have many fine lines i do have a few around my eye area and they are gradually fading, all in all I'm going to stick with this product as i feel that if i can tell a little difference now its obviously is going to get better within time.

http://www.renskincare.com/

7 WAYS TO IMPROVE YOUR GAY RELATIONSHIP!!!!!

7 WAYS TO IMPROVE YOUR GAY RELATIONSHIP!!!!!

1: DELETE SOCIAL MEDIA, E.G. GRINDR, JACKD, ETC, ETC:  Couples still on gay social apps are bound to end at some point, we all know facebook should be renamed divorcebook well cruising apps are there for one reason, cruising!

2: DON'T FEEL THE NEED TO MAKE EVERYTHING PERFECT:  Life isn't perfect, its all about trail and error having that fairy tail Disney relationship takes work and 9 times out of 10 it never happens.

3: AGREE TO DISAGREE: Yes everyone wants to sort a argument out but if your adamant that your right their wrong, this is where you need to agree to disagree.

4: DON'T BE COMPLACEMENT: That get's boring after a while, although it makes you feel safe, its most probably making the other half bored. try new things step out of your comfort zone.

5: IF YOU FAIL TO PREPARE, PREPARE TO FAIL!!!!

6: BUILD YOUR OWN DREAMS: As much as a relationship is a 2 way story, we all have our own dreams in life, just because your in a relationship doesn't mean you cant build your own dreams, granted its nice to share, but not everyone loves everything, its OK to be selfish once in a while.

7: AND FINALLY, TRUST: A relationship without trust is like having a phone with no service, what do you do with the phone? you play games.

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FAKE TAN

Fake Tanning

I think this biog applies to everyone, i mean who doesn't like to have abit of a glow, and we also all know in England its very rare we get decent enough weather to get a tan. So what are the options to perfect that tan? Make-up, sunbed, gradual moisturizing tanner or fake tan.

Personally i find going on a sunbed hard work unless you live next door to a tanning salon then it would make life easier, but unfortunately i don't and I'm far too lazy to travel, and then there's make up to help you looked tanned, but to me that's just short term and if your going to spend time in putting make-up on your entire body then blending it so it looks semi natural you are a more patient person than me, there's many ways to get that perfect tan but me, I'd prefer to go down the fake tan route, as its quicker more cost affective ( i find ) and does what a sunbed does in weeks in a matter of hours, and i love it, i'm by far no tanning expert but name one fake tan that i haven't used, guarantee you won't be able to.

We all know there's many of brands of fake tan cheap and costly ones, all come out with a different result, i will personally say I've only ever used one cheap fake tan, St Moritz i think it was called and that fake tan alone made me realise why it was cheap so I've since stayed away from cheap tan, I'm not rich in any kind of way so spending lots of money on tan is a luxury and i probably buy a new tan every 2-3months as i find the ones i use last quite a long time if you do good maintenance.

My 10/10 of fake tans my go too tan

I have 2 favorite tans and one of those favorites is a brand so realistically i have many favorites but lets go to my favorite tan and not brand, it has got to be VIP tan by Vicky Pattison, and i will admit the main reason i bought this tan is because I'm obsessed with Geordie Shore and Vicky is off Geordie shore, anyway back to the tan i use the tanning mist by far it is the best smelling tan I've ever used, you know the tanning smell is somewhat generic, you can spray the tan straight onto the skin for a more intense colour/ cover or use a tanning mitt to buff the tan into the skin, I've used both options and i will say it makes no difference the tan goes on perfect I've never experienced streaks with this tan, I'm not 100% if this tan comes in light, medium or dark, but the dry mist is probably light/medium but you can layer it to your desired colour which is perfect as i like to be dark.

The best result or to get the best result with this tan or my step by step on what worked with me is exfoliate and moisturise i start exfoliating at least 3 days before and moisturise everyday anyway and i always use a fake tan moisturiser and exfoliate from a different company which is my number 1 go to fake tan, all in all i would defo give this tan a 9/10 and the reason i give it a 9 and not a 10 is because the line doesn't have a exfoliate or moisturiser as soon as they fetch them into the line it will go too a 10.

Onto my next tan......

this is basically going to be a short little part about my number 1 tanner as i have emailed the company asking for more information about the tan so i can give you a more in depth review about everything, so yes my number 1 tanning has got to be Fake Bake, every product in this line i find amazing if i had to choose one item out of the line it would have to be the Flawless tan, yes all the tan from Fake Bake can be abit pricey but well worth it, the only down side to this tan well my negative comment about it I'm sure some people will love and its not just this company, many companies have a facial tanner, i personally find this another money thing for the company because to me all face tanners are the exact same as the body tanners do the same thing just in a smaller can which are generally priced the same as the bigger tan which I've always found weird and the reason i had a facial tanner is because it was a gift, i will go into more detail about the Fake Bake range when i receive a email back from the company so i don't miss anything outand i will get back to you

VIP Tan By Vicky Pattison

Fake Bake

GREY HAIR TONER

Hair Toner

So we've all seen certain celebrities with the grey/blue/purple hair e.g. Nicole Richie, Kelly Osbourne, Tyler Oakley. Just to name a few, but the question is how do we get the same colour? Well through trial and error i think i've come close enough without going and spendng £££'s at a salon.

Here is my review on 3 products that i have found, and that i am impressed with.

Fudge Paint Box - Purple Haze

What the product says: Somewhere between Deep Purple and Ultra Violent. Fudge Paintbox Purple Haze is a shade to get into a flap about. Your mother wouldn't like it.

Ammonia Free

Peroxide Free

What i've learnt with this product is, to mix it with your chosen conditioner, unless you are wanting a really purple colour as the first time i just put the product straight on my hair and within seconds it was bright purple, i found it good mixing with more conditioner for when ive bleached my hair to get rid of the brassy tones, and left my hair like a pastel purple. 8/10

Fudge Paintbox - Whiter Shade Of Pale

What the product say's: Whiter shade of pale can be added to any Fudge Paintbox hair dye to change the intensity and give more pastel tones.

Toner and Creative mixer

I will admit i have never mixed this product with any other toner as i find it perfect for the colour i want to achieve, i dont even mix it with conditioner, i use this product quite alot, initially when i bleach my hair i will use a different toner if im left with brassy bits, and use this more as a refresher to keep my hair touched up i would recommend this product to anyone 10/10

Bleach London - Blullini

What the product say's: This Product doesnt really say much for its self all the container says is "Super Cool Colour"

I've used this product once and the end result was a intense Green/Turquoise not what i expected it to be, i then tried it with some conditioner and the colour was still the same just more pastel and not as intense althought it was a nice colour and i would recommend if your daring, it just wasn't for me but i am going to try and mix it with the Fudge Whiter Shade Of Pale and hopefully will get a nice colour. 6/10

One thing about all these products that i will say, is that they smell amazing and are really affordable

Hiv, My Journey So Far

This is my story....

Its been over a year since I was diagnosed with HIV, although my journey has been mainly positive (no pun intended) I've had some not so great times, for example my obsessive need for free things (beauty sample's) basically saved my life and caused upset, we all know we like the little beauty sample packs off the internet that are free well I like anything that's free basically, anyway I will start from the beginning basically I was on the Internet looking for products to test so the best place is the free sights I'm not big on spending lots off money on cosmetics if they ain't going to do what they say they do so I try get a sample first and came across this website what was full of free samples so obviously I sent them all to my address, whilst looking thought this amazing sight I came across a HIV home test kit, bare in mind I'm gay not been sexually active in a few month and never had a HIV test, just the normal STI test, so I thought what the hell nothing to hide lets have it, time went on all my little goodies came in the post on July 18th 2013 along with this little HIV test kit (I ordered 2 a saliva kit and a blood kit) as soon as I opened it and realised what it was my stomach dropped like I knew the outcome was going to be bad, I've never had unprotected sex at least I didn't think I had :-/ so anyway I just put them in my work bag and forgot all about them that night I went to work to start my night shift got in my office and as usual I went in my bag to get my iPhone charger and my eyes glared at the saliva kit so I thought what the hell, I'm sat there reading the instructions, Simple! so I went to the bathroom and put the cotton bud looking stick in my mouth sat there 2 minutes, filled out the form with my details and put the test in the envelope, Done! Sorted! Posted!
After I posted the kit that was it I never even thought about my result in all seriousness  I forgot all about it, about 2 weeks went by and I got a phone call from a unknown number (I hate unknown numbers) so I didn't answer it so they left me a voice mail to say phone them still forgetting I did the test I phoned the number as it sounded serious, yup it was serious they basically told me my test came back not positive and not negative so I need to go to the clinic for further tests, we all know in life if something is indecisive 9 times out of 10 its bad news, so from that day was the start of the rest of my life or maybe in my head it was the start of the end off my life!

I remember like it was this morning I texted my best friend saying I had bad news and she phoned me and I explained what had happened I could hear the upset in voice not like she was ashamed upset it was more like the upset that she wished she could rewind life and make sure it never happened to me, we are pretty close like brother and sister, so anyway we finished the conversation and the first thing I did was search my bedroom for a blank CD, yeah id just been told I was HIV positive and I was looking for a blank CD makes sense right, well I found my blank CD and put it in my laptop and burned 2 songs onto the CD, yup I made my funeral CD!! i didn't know anything about HIV except what we all think that its a death sentence, how wrong was i. i just remember that night i was at work again and me and my fiend must have shared the same mind that night as we was both researching HIV which made the whole thing abit bare able.

It took me a month to build up the courage to actually go to the hospital to get a proper check up, blood tests and stuff, and if it wasn't for my best friend nagging me every day to go i would prob be sat here writing this either really ill, or who knows.

so the day comes my friend picks me up that morning we go to hospital sit in the waiting room for the doctor to call me in, i remember saying to my friend i shouldn't be here I've never had unprotected sex and I've never had a STI so its not possible, the doctor shouted my in and it was literally like someone had took over my body and i wasn't controlling it, i sat down at her desk and she said something along the lines of a shop keeper 'hi how can i help' and without even thinking i said the words 'i have HIV and would like my bloods doing' WTF where did that come from maybe deep down i remembered a time i went out got absolutely mortal went back to my friends house and ya know did it! there i said it i had unprotected sex. so i had all the test done went back and she confirmed what i already knew that i was HIV positive, we went through all the steps and all different types of medication i could take when it came to that, at first the monthly hospital visit where hard it was like i just wanted to get on with life and not be reminded every time i went to the hospital.

i think it was 2 month since my first hospital appointment when i went for my monthly appointment and she said i need to take medication, i was convinced i was never gonna take medication for the rest of my life, but i knew i had no choice id got my self into this situation so its the least i could do for my body, so anyway the doctor came out with a tray full of medication choices, i love shopping and having all the different choices of clothes to choose from but who'd have thought i would end up choosing different types of medication to save my life, so the doctor explained all the different types of medication to me and it was agreed by me and the doctor that i would take 3 tablets per day.

so day one of taking medication i popped my 3 tablets, Ritonavir, Darunavir and Truvada i sat on my bed waiting for some kind of miracle to happen , yeah nothing happened. so it took a while for my HIV to be undetected but finally the day came and it was undetected i was actually so relieved i know it prob wont stay that way but it was the best news i had in a long time.

I really could go on and on about my experience of living with HIV but to other people and their stories I've had it easy all i can say is at the end of 2013, there were 35-37 million people living with HIV i was one of those statistics, that's really not a good number as much as we all wish HIV, cancer etc etc didn't exist well it does and we need to open our eyes.

HIV is looked down on in the gay community and its pretty shocking there are probably 3 people who Know I'm HIV positive, my mum, my best friend and my friend, and I'm pretty much over been ashamed of of my virus, this is me, i don't want anyone to accept me for my virus i want people to accept me because I'm me the same person I've always been and the same person i will always be, my virus doesn't define me im in control of my virus with a little help from my medication obviously but if there any advice i can give to someone who is newly diagnosed with HIV it would be, even when things don't seem like they're going your way, looking at things with a a positive attitude may be enough to get you through, having strong relationships with other people can be a matter of life or death, even if that relationship is with other people stories on youtube, HIV charities or close fiend, understand you are not alone!

Now is the time i begin to live my life the way i want to live it yes i will probably still have the days where i don't want get out of bed but as that saying goes 'your a long time dead' I'm just glad that i had a addiction to free samples off the Internet because who knows what the outcome could have been.

One last note, i know the person who passed the virus onto me, it was a close friend who knew he had the virus before hand, yes i probably could get police involved, but you tell me what would that solve? nothing! i would still be positive, moral of the story is as much as you may think you trust someone, when it comes to sex, maybe you don't just be careful think of yourself and look after your own body, respect it and it will respect yo.



Quick follow up

I wrote the previous blog several months ago and didnt publish it as i was worried about such a important important part of my life been known to people, but i'm done with feeling ashamed of myself because my so called community has ostracized me because of my virus, the previous blog is a overview of my experiences, i could write a bible on my experience, but short and sweet it the way to go. 
What i didn't mention was how great i feel since been diagnosed, which i strange i know considering i have a virus which can be life threatening, but what i mean by feeling great is, before i was diagnosed i was generally poorly like flu, feeling fatigued all the time, my skin was shocking, and i weighed 8 stone and you could physically see i was skinny, but since starting medication i've taken a 360, i've gained 2 stone, i have a appetite like you wouldn't believe all in all i look the best i've ever looked, the point i'm trying to get to is that as much as HIV is known as a death sentence, that is what youve heard from media etc etc, please educate yourself on the situation before you jump to conclusions because that in its self could save your life or others.